SOMETHINGS ARE BETTER LEFT UNSAID, OR IS IT?

PIC; GOOGLE

“I am leaving tomorrow. Will you not come to meet me? If you are coming, I will be home today, otherwise a friend invited me for early dinner,” told Doelma over the phone to a friend of hers. If Drimed ever goes to Doelma’s place, it would not only be their first one-to-one meeting but, also their last.

Drimed was unsure of whether to heed to her final call or just avoid the meeting with some excuses. What’s the point in meeting her in the penultimate day of her departure? Those unsaid words and feelings are now best  left to rest or else it will only lead to the opening of floodgates of built up emotions and will be the cause of further heartbreaks.

Yet, another side of him wanted to go and meet her even if it is for the last time. And the fact that Doelma asked him to see her cannot have been a casual reason. She wanted to see him of all the people. She must have mustered her courage to have called him to ask for the meeting, he thought. So, Drimed weighed the options and finally made a return call telling Doelma, that he is coming.

Over the phone, she told him that, everything had been packed, ready to be shipped. “I have packed everything and I had to borrow even plates from my neighbours last night. In fact, I am being funny to ask you to come here but, for the last time, I wanted to see you,” she said, when Drimed called back to tell her, he is coming.

“Will you also bring me some of your favourite songs in your phone? I always loved your collections,” she added.

Drimed made a quick revision of his lists of favourite songs and transferred to his spare micro SD card. But, he did not know what to take as a parting gift. He thought, if there is anything to be gifted it must be appropriate. So he scoured the market and bought a thanka scroll. He thought, it is the most appropriate gift as it also auspicious and something related to spirituality.

Dolma saw Drimed coming. So she went outside her rented home to receive him. The house was a small traditional one with two rooms and a separate kitchen. It is not a bad place except it hung little precariously on a slope. Outside the house some people are found basking in the afternoon sun while three children ran helter-skelter merrily.

As is customary, Dolema prepared an aromatic tea but, she had to run to her neighbour’s place to get a porcelain mug serve. When she finally brought the steaming tea, she said, she forgot to leave even those essential utensils unpacked and now she is not sure which boxes contained what.

Drimed sat on a dewan wrapped in cardbox papers for transportation as Dolema made herself comfortable sitting on the floor. For few minutes they sat silently not knowing how to begin. “So you are going tomorrow? Why do you want to go so fast?” asked Drimed finally.

“Someone found me a vehicle going that way, so I have decided to go.”

“Yeah, sometimes everything falls in the right places like it has happened to you. It is a sign, something good is in store. You are going and there is vehicle going that way. It cannot get better.”

“Yeah but, I don’t know if it is going to be for better or worse. I wanted to go at one point of time. But, I don’t know why, if I have the choice I would love to remain back,” said Doelma, her voice chocking.

Drimed could not say anything too. There was a surge of emotion welling up inside him too. And he wondered why he is feeling that way. They have become good friends over the time. They even began liking each other but, that is it. The two never had enough courage to make their feelings known to each other and it had remained that way to this day, a time when they are on the verge of going separate ways. But, even without speaking and expressing anything, both understood through telepathy what they felt for each other.

In their first and the last meeting, both are unsure whether to let the other know what is going on inside their heart. They also realize the futility of letting each other know of their feelings now.  So they decide to let their emotions fizzle out.

When Drimed came to meet her the last time, one thing he wanted to do was muster all his courage and hug her. But, when the time came for him to leave her, all he could do was wish her safe journey. The reason Doelma called Drimed was to tell him she liked him at least and plant a kiss on his cheek for being the most wonderful friend outside her family. But, when he finally rose to leave, she could not even look into his eyes as tears filled them. And long after the parting, both kept thinking of each other knowing that with time new friends will come into their lives and enable them to move forward.

What do you think of this story? Did Drimed and Doelma do the right thing by leaving their feelings unexpressed even in their last meeting? After all, they have not been able to let each other know of their true feelings when they were together. Will time heal their feelings by ushering in new friends that may give new directions in their lives? Are certain things best left unsaid for the fear of their repercussions? I leave this for my readers to decide.

Gyembo Namgyal

February 9, 2015 11:57 PM